What would happen if...

What would happen if you patented something? You would…

Have the patent stolen, and go to prison for creating the product whose patent belonged to someone else. Then you'd be beaten up by the other people in jail. From not eating, you get skinny enough to fit through the bars, and you sneak out only to find that you family disowned you for "breaking the law". Then…

You'd come here where no one know's about you and would visit us! :D ;P Then…

hopes to revive page

What would happen if you became the dictator of a small country?

What would happen if you became the dictator of a small country?

I would make it a capitalistic, free market society with no welfare, a large military, homosexuality and abortion would be outlawed, and everyone except for liberals would be really happy!

Then the college students would become unhappy with the totalitarian war and start a revolution. Then they would storm the palace with torches and clubs looking for you. Then you would try to escape down a laundry shoot, and then…

I would end up going straight into a washing machine. Round, and round, and round, for an hour and a half. Man, is that water hot!

Then the laundry maid would find and turn him over to the rebels, who would decide that since he was already washed, they might as well finish the job and hang him on the clothes line. But then you would tell them that clothes lines are old fashioned so they would put you into the dryer instead. Then…

After spinning round and round and round some more, and feeling very sick, I would dismantle the dryer from the inside using my pocket screw driver, and escape out the back. Then….

Then you would run out onto the side walk and a truck driver would get distracted by your gleaming clean look and crash into you. Then…

After angrily haranguing my subject for his carelessness, I force him to put me into his truck. I then drive myself to the hospital (literally INTO the hospital, since at this point I'm not very mobile). Then…

The the hospital won't accept your insurance, so you have to pay the entire bill. You also have to pay to build a new hospital since you wrecked the old one, although that bill is much smaller. Then…

The the hospital won't accept your insurance, so you have to pay the entire bill. You also have to pay to build a new hospital since you wrecked the old one, although that bill is much smaller. Then...

I light fire to the truck still in the hospital lobby for the hospital's lack of competence. I'm the dictator, I can do what I want, right? After running out of the burning building, I decide the best defense is an offense. Then…

Then you take another truck and fill it with gasoline and drive it into the palace, only you forget to get out of the truck before it crashes and blows up. You run out of the wreckage on fire, but fortunately, you remember to stop, drop, and roll. You destroy your palace and end up with some nasty burns, but it was all worth it because you crushed the rebellion. Then you find out that all the rebels had been eating upside-down cheeseburger at the restaurant across the street and weren't harmed at all. Then…

I put a ban on upside-down cheeseburgers, and poison cheeseburger buns just in case the rebels disobey my orders. Then….

They the public would eat upside-up cheeseburgers and get poisoned and you'd become very unpopular and everyone would start eating upside-down pizza just to spite you. Then…

I rent a trailer since I semi-accidentally blew up my palace. It is delivered shortly and I get into it, arming it with machine guns. Then….

You would find that the rebels had replaced the machine guns with water guns and are outside mocking you. Then…

Not realizing that the machine guns are actually water guns, you begin shooting at the rebels, but as a combined effect of your ignorance and your anger against the rebels, you shoot enough water out of the guns that the entire city floods. Then…

[For a dictator, I sure have a lot of people telling me how to run my life! lol]

I suddenly discover that the trailer I am in cannot float and I am several hundred feet under water! Seeing a couple mermaids, I swim towards them, hoping they will tell me the way to the nearest building. After getting within 100 feet of them, I remember that they want to eat humans. Then….

You try to swim away, but you don't have a fish tail, so the mermaids catch you and take you down to the bottom of the city. They give you a little air bubble so that they can eat you fresh. Then they try to sprinkle salt on you but because your in water it doesn't work out very well. Then they get into an argument over whether they should pepper, and you swim away. Then…

What would happen if…
you were the servant in a rich person's house?

The rich man's money would be stolen and you would be blamed. Then…

To prove your innocence, you look through the other servants rooms to try to find the stolen money. However, you're found looking through the things, and even more suspicion is thrown on you. Then…

Then you remember that you had put a security camera in the hallway outside your bedroom just in case something like this happened. You went to go get it to prove your innocence, but the thief has stolen that, too. So you try to find Sherlock Holmes, only to find out that he has been a fictional character this whole time! Meanwhile, back at home, they are convinced you are guilty because you fled the country. Then….

Your passport is revoked by the authorities, who send out a CERT search and rescue team to find you. Then….

You notice your wanted poster in a London subway station, so you decide to swim across the English Channel to France where you change your identity. You live there for two years, you think all is well, then….

…One of the members of the search and rescue team, which has by now stopped looking for you, goes on vacation in France and runs into you on the street. Immediately recognizing you, he drags you into his car and drives you to the authorities, lecturing you the whole time on why it's such a bad idea to try and evade the law. Then…

You escape from the car and run down the street while screaming "You can't catch meeee!! I'm the wind!!!". Then you run into….

…a giant purple packing peanut. then….

Then you scream because you recognize the packing peanut from your -dreams-, er nightmares. But the packing peanut wants to help you. So both of you go to…

…the moon. Then

…You realize that since packing peanuts don't breathe, the peanut failed to bring any oxygen along. Then…

You die. The end. XD

Then you realize that all along you thought they were talking about you, but they really suspected a guy with an identical name. However, it's kind of late because you're dead, unless the packing peanut knows CPR xP

But, you realize, even if it does know CPR, it will be useless to you because (you remember) the poor thing cannot breathe. Then you begin to wonder why you are still realizing and remembering and wondering things while you are dead.

Then you realize that if Nicholas would stop trying to crush your hopes and dreams of living, one of the astronauts on the international space station might be able to revive you. Then…

And then you wake up and realize everything was a dream. You get out of bed and walk to the doorway and you notice a purple packing peanut stealing money….you shake your head, turn him in to your master, and he gives you a reward.
The End. xP

And now that we're done with THAT weirdness, someone has to come up with another storyline. Then….

What if the world forgot how to use grammar?

…there aint gonna be nobody left to fix this here sentence! Then…

horrified gasp As if using that awful grammar wasn't enough, you didn't even use proper punctuation! xP xP Then again, "ain't" isn't proper to begin with, so I'm not sure it can be properly punctuated.

Anyway, since there are some of us who simply are not going to use bad grammar, we flee to space and launch a global campaign against bad and sloppy grammar from the safety of the space station. Then…

…since no one back on earth can understand your perfect grammar, things don't get very far. Then…

We rethink our strategy and decide that we'll take turns going back to earth. Half of us will go, and the other half will stay for one month; then we'll all switch places because hearing all that bad grammar gets painful. So the first group gets in a spaceship and comes back to earth. Then…

…that doesn't work, so Katrina comes down from space and becomes the dictator of the world. Everyone who uses improper grammar will be thrown in jail. This works for a few years, then the "speling rebelers" emerge. They try to take over the planet. Then…

…because Katrina and the few grammar nazis on earth are far outnumbered by those who don't care about grammar, so Katrina is only dictator of the area immediately around her. Therefore the "speling rebelers" gain control over the world. Then…

(how did I get on the side of those who don't like grammar????)

My dislike of dictators is actually one of the few things that surpasses my dislike of bad grammar, bad spelling, and bad punctuation, so I step down and flee back to space. Then…

the "speling rebelers" still rule the world? I have no idea where this is going, or why I'm even on this side, lol :P Then…

You could switch sides… oh wait, I have a better idea.

Since Zach is still on earth, and appeared to be on the side of the rebels, he secures a high position in the new government, but then uses his newfound power to restore at least a small knowledge of proper spelling to the world. Then…