Jokes :)

Started by Dani(elle)
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Sarah

facedesk I'm not even gonna say it.
My dad came up with a similar joke several years ago:
What do you call a mango that someone has eaten?

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Emily H

Any kind of red candy could work too. xP
Or a fist after just having come into contact with your face. The possibilities could go on and on.

Oh definitely. Yes, yes they could.

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Sarah

What do you call a mango that someone has eaten?
Uhh... a mango that's being digested? I really don't know...

No, a mangone.

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Jedidiah Diligence Breckinridge III

FEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.
PURE SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else’s cows. You have to take care of all of the cows. The government gives you as much milk as you need.
BUREAUCRATIC SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and put them in a barn with everyone else’s cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs as the regulations say you need.
FASCISM: You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them and sells you the milk.
PURE COMMUNISM: You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take care of them, and you all share the milk.
RUSSIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk.
CAMBODIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. The government takes both of them and shoots you.
DICTATORSHIP: You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you.
PURE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk.
REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.
BUREAUCRACY: You have two cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.
PURE ANARCHY: You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to take the cows and kill you.
LIBERTARIAN/ANARCHO-CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
SURREALISM: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.

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His Servant

My dad saw this around June of this year (pretty much the same… with a couple different ones) and I basically died laughing. This one seems to be a bit different, and doesn't have some of the ones I remember. But still, quite funny indeed. Maybe it helped that my dad read it… he did a great job at that. :P

And YAY!! for capitalism: "You have two cows. You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows." XD

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Jackson

The answers:

  1. What BB family likes to talk about Dave? Davis
  2. What BB family grows on trees? Moss
  3. What BB family likes Tangled? Flynn
  4. What BB family is short and likes to tap dance? Tappendorfs [Tappin' Dwarves]
  5. What BB family are woodworkers? Saunders
  6. What BB family is beyond gross? Xiques
  7. What BB family likes to eat? Chew
  8. What BB family enjoys provolone? Ches
  9. What BB family follows skeletons? Bontrager [Bone-trackers]
  10. What BB family likes the color of sticks? Brown
  11. What BB family loves fries? French
  12. What BB family is like the capital of Alabama? Montgomery
  13. What BB family is never content? Moore
  14. What BB family are scaredy-cats? Fierer
  15. What BB family likes purple birds? Martin
  16. What BB family is the fun size version of crows? Minica [Mini-caw]
  17. What BB family makes up everything? Adams [Atoms]
  18. What BB family likes to bake? Cooksey
  19. What BB family has a desire for food? Craven
  20. What BB family mixes shades of white? Crosswhite
  21. What BB family makes other girls do things? Forster [Forced her]
  22. What BB family has hair? Hair
  23. What BB family likes pork? Hamilton
  24. What BB family lives on the shore? Harbour
  25. What BB family describes hair? Harris
  26. What BB family sinks every basket? Hooper
  27. What BB family sleeps? Knapp
  28. What BB family is equipped for winter? *Mitton
  29. What BB family has lots of 5-cent coins? Nichols
  30. What BB family’s pork is outdated? Oldham
  31. What BB family loves H2O? Waters
  32. What BB family never hears "Thank you; that is incorrect."? *Wright
  33. What BB family groans five times? The P's :P
  34. What BB family makes streets? Rhodes
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Andrew

Nice. :) My favorites might be 4, 9, and 16 (which I know the answers to, since I helped make these… :P).

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2 Corinthians 5:17

1. Davis? 3. Flynn. xP 7. Chew. :P 8. Che (Cheese :P). 10. Brown. 14. Fierer. :P 20. Crosswhite. 29. Nichols. :P 31. Waters. 32. Wright. xP

Hey you're good!! :D lol!

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Jackson

I want to know mine!

We couldn't think of one for you (well, we did have something about pants, but that wasn't too funny).

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