Dating vs Courtship.

sits back and agrees with big sister

I don't think this is "theology"… all our arguments are based on human reasoning. There is no scripture in the Bible that would say teasing is right or wrong. You have some really good arguments, but I don't think they fit every situation.
Everyone is different! It's not a one size fits all kind of thing.

So (based on your answer to #9) you agree that teasing between good friends and siblings isn't always bad?

What's happening?

I don't think there's any place for it; however in the instances you mentioned, I might not even say it's inappropriate, but under no circumstances would I not say it's foolish.

I'd never say it's sinful unless it's being done in a sinful way.

And by the way, if you're teasing someone about romance, they ask you to stop, and you keep doing it to them, that is outright sin and you need to repent. There is absolutely no negotiating on that point.

What's happening?

Another unnecessary debate. We seem to be good at those around here.

What's happening?

Another unnecessary debate. We seem to be good at those around here.

No one's forcing you to be involved with this at all.

What's happening?

Another unnecessary debate. We seem to be good at those around here.

If you had convictions in this area, you wouldn't call it unnecessary. :P

Another excellent point… we can't say what everyone else does is unimportant just because we're not interested.

Do you own _It's (not that) Complicated_? If so, based on your last comment, I would encourage you to read and think on chapter 10 - pages 179-190.

Hmmm... I don't think I can agree with that. Unless what Nathan dose with helping people who are in love is wrong too.

Why can you not agree with it? I'd be glad to know your reasoning for this.
I would rather not get into that again. Nathan already knows my convictions in regards to teenage love.

I thought we agreed that it depends on the person/conscience? But I don't think that's what she was talking about.

What's happening?

Another unnecessary debate. We seem to be good at those around here.

Oh. Sounds like I'd be useful here!

What's happening?

Another unnecessary debate. We seem to be good at those around here.

No one's forcing you to be involved with this at all.

Because we're the heroes Memverse needs, not the ones it derserves!

Then I do not understand what she was talking about.

Then I do not understand what she was talking about.

I think she's talking about any talk regards to love at all, and not seeing the difference between brotherly encouragement and childish teasing. Although I could be misinterpreting her… maybe I should just let her explain.

By the way… the way I remember things going was that I said something and you said "That's all I'm trying to say." So I think we do agree on the essentials. As long as people don't think it's inherently inappropriate or unwise, then I don't consider myself to disagree–even if they think waiting is wiser. I respect that opinion, although I believe that both are equally wise.

Do you own _It's (not that) Complicated_? If so, based on your last comment, I would encourage you to read and think on chapter 10 - pages 179-190.

Hmmm... I don't think I can agree with that. Unless what Nathan dose with helping people who are in love is wrong too.

Sarah, I take it that you have read that? Could you clarify what you mean by your statement?

Well, I'm leaving now, so I'll have to see what she says later.

That was in regards to saving your whole heart for marriage, yes; which we do agree on. There are smaller things though, that I think we still haven't agreed on. It'd be so much easier to discuss it in person. sigh
I was just saying that we didn't need to get into all that again, since you already know what my convictions are.

Pops out now

I think there is someone who can give great insight on this topic in general.

Please welcome le guest speaker….

!https://frohan55.files.wordpress.com/2013/02/forever-alone.png?w=300&h=290!

This is kind of foolish arguing that isn't going to get us anywhere.
What's important to God is that we love our neighbor as ourself. I think teasing can be done in love (at appropriate times)… but if you don't agree I will respect your veiws by not teasing you or my other friends when you are around. :)

We can do that sometime, if you like. I know we still disagree on some things, but it seemed to me like we agree on the essentials.

What's happening?

Another unnecessary debate. We seem to be good at those around here.

No one's forcing you to be involved with this at all.

Because we're the heroes Memverse needs, not the ones it derserves!

Yes, but I meant the forever alone! Isn't that so awesome!?

Do you own _It's (not that) Complicated_? If so, based on your last comment, I would encourage you to read and think on chapter 10 - pages 179-190.

Hmmm... I don't think I can agree with that. Unless what Nathan dose with helping people who are in love is wrong too.

Sarah, I take it that you have read that? Could you clarify what you mean by your statement?

Ah, now that I think about it that could have been rather offensive. I'm sorry.
What I was saying is that if we go with what that book says then 'teen love' is not acceptable, and neither would your advice on the subject. See what I mean?
I really appreciate that book and think it has really good advice on a hard subject, and is very good for encouraging deep thinking - but I don't agree with everything.

Okay; I see. No; I wasn't offended (you could have been a bit more discreet, but I personally am not offended). Okay, so I guess Rosie was correct in her interpretation of what you said.

Yeah. Nowhere in Scripture does it say we should suppress the natural feelings God puts in our hearts if He doesn't put it there when WE think it should be there.

Yes, but I meant the forever alone! Isn't that so awesome!?

As usual. ;)

Yeah. Nowhere in Scripture does it say we should suppress the natural feelings God puts in our hearts if He doesn't put it there when WE think it should be there.

I do not believe this nor think this way.

Yeah. Nowhere in Scripture does it say we should suppress the natural feelings God puts in our hearts if He doesn't put it there when WE think it should be there.

I do not believe this nor think this way.

The simple truth is that God calls everyone to be in love at different ages. For some people, that might be in the teenage years, for others, in the 20s, for others, later than that. And of course we can't spontaneously assume all feelings are from God, but we can't go wrong by focusing on what God wants as opposed to what we want. I think everyone should wait to be love simply until it's God's choice instead of theirs–so don't let yourself fall in love on your own; allow God to lead your heart through every stage of the process.
Rosie, from your personal convictions, it sounds like you're one of the people God is calling to wait. You have some excellent personal policies, but God calls other people to different things–so they can't be applied to everyone. In all the many places in which the Bible speaks of being in love, it says nothing about age, leaving that issue up to the individual guidance of God.

I entirely agree.

Hope I haven't been a bug about this. xD

I entirely agree.

Hope I haven't been a bug about this. xD

You haven't. ;) You explained that in way that I have never heard you do before; and I think we may actually agree.

Great! I'm glad we found common ground on this, along with most others, but I'm also glad I didn't convince you to do anything against what you believe God wants for your own life.

I am glad as well; having this unresolved was rather frustrating. ;) I try to be open-minded, but I think I tend to be close-minded when it comes to convictions - to my downfall. :P

Awwwwwwwwww!

In reply to Nathan Wright and God's Maiden of Virtue (Heart for Brazil)

Awwwwwwwwww! In reply to Nathan Wright and God's Maiden of Virtue (Heart for Brazil)

Hast thou respect for thy fellow man?
https://www.memverse.com/forums/5/topics/dating-vs-courtship?page=22#post-317154

Awwwwwwwwww! In reply to Nathan Wright and God's Maiden of Virtue (Heart for Brazil)

Hast thou respect for thy fellow man? https://www.memverse.com/forums/5/topics/dating-vs-courtship?page=22#post-317154

Rosie's a woman.

^I think…^

Awwwwwwwwww! In reply to Nathan Wright and God's Maiden of Virtue (Heart for Brazil)

Hast thou respect for thy fellow man? https://www.memverse.com/forums/5/topics/dating-vs-courtship?page=22#post-317154

Rosie's a woman. ^I think...^

You know I was having the same struggle you are right at the BB…kept calling Rosie 'bruh' and stuff and Rosie be looking funny at me. Never could figure out why.

That's the third time you've committed the logical fallacy of equivocation in the past few days!

Hey Sarah, just saying, but I've had this happen to me before, and the awkwardness is not fun; it makes the friendship harder for a while. This is a different kind of awkwardness. An awkwardness that should not have to be there. Just wanting to understand your view on this better - what do you see as the point in "romantic teasing"?

For me, personally, I think that this kind of teasing is inappropriate. I had a friendship break, partly from this. I found myself being sucked into it, and so, when we left AK, once I was away from this particular person, I saw how wrong I was and basically cut off all communication with this particular person.

And this has come up, again, in the last couple weeks. And it's making things really uncomfortable for me, as apparently I am the only one opposed to it out of everyone involved.

Perhaps my biggest problem with it is the associations of things that are truly bad that I was also getting sucked into along with it, and so I pushed all of that away. I think that this can be a matter of personal conviction, but I know that I am convicted that it is wrong.

Thanks for sharing, Dani. (I'll be praying for you and your friends in that.)

Folks. Whether it's right or wrong in and of itself, my question is: Is it worth the risk? Even if you fancy it is for you, romance teasing involves getting others involved. Don't risk making yourself responsible for their problems.

Whether it's right or wrong _in and of itself_, my question is: *Is it worth the risk?*

…(is it worth the risk) considering that it has no benefits? If there were benefits to doing it, it might be… but there aren't… so it ain't–period. Yes; I know it's possible for good things to come out of it, but that's a total gamble.

I just remembered something. When people hear of or see me working with or talking to a girl and unreasonably act suspicious that there might be something between us just because of that, I usually say "Don't worry; she said no." To an extent, this could be called romance teasing, because it does admittedly joke about romance. But I think this is very beneficial because it's a lighthearted way of getting down to the point. And it always works! When I seriously answered "no", that doesn't satisfy. But when I've given that joke answer, that settles it. So this is a form of romance joke about a specific person that I think is okay–but it has a point, it doesn't flirt, it doesn't force anyone else into an awkward situation, and it generally works in getting out of serious romance speculation situations.

Here are the reasons why I believe that romance teasing is inappropriate. I'm not saying these things are inevitable, but--being that romance teasing has absolutely no benefits--it is foolish in light of the abundant danger. 1) Misunderstandings both on the part of the people and outsiders. 2) Humiliation. 3) Feelings being induced the wrong way. 4) Hurt. 5) Disrespect both to parents and to the people. 6) Just plain rudeness of mocking someone's heart. 7) Flirting. 8) Losing sight of the gravity of love. 9) Awkwardness in the friendship of the two people. 10) Friction.

I had wanted to jump in but then didn't...anyways... 1) Misunderdstandings happen anyway. Sometimes the teasing gives the people a chance to talk about what there thinking. 2) Humiliation is part of growing up. You learn a lot from falling down. 3) Hmmm... maybe. 4) Not necessarily. For me, it wasn't that way. 5) Not exactly sure about this one... 6) If the person is extremely sensitive maybe it would be taken that way. 7) Um...disagreed. 8) Maybe... 9) Not necessarily. For me, it wasn't that way. 10) Only if the people being teased take it too personally. 

Here are the reasons why I believe that romance teasing is inappropriate. I'm not saying these things are inevitable, but--being that romance teasing has absolutely no benefits--it is foolish in light of the abundant danger. 1) Misunderstandings both on the part of the people and outsiders. 2) Humiliation. 3) Feelings being induced the wrong way. 4) Hurt. 5) Disrespect both to parents and to the people. 6) Just plain rudeness of mocking someone's heart. 7) Flirting. 8) Losing sight of the gravity of love. 9) Awkwardness in the friendship of the two people. 10) Friction.

I had wanted to jump in but then didn't...anyways... 1) Misunderdstandings happen anyway. Sometimes the teasing gives the people a chance to talk about what there thinking. 2) Humiliation is part of growing up. You learn a lot from falling down. 3) Hmmm... maybe. 4) Not necessarily. For me, it wasn't that way. 5) Not exactly sure about this one... 6) If the person is extremely sensitive maybe it would be taken that way. 7) Um...disagreed. 8) Maybe... 9) Not necessarily. For me, it wasn't that way. 10) Only if the people being teased take it too personally. 

snickers

So, did you feel I was flirting with you when I teased you about guys?

sputters and bursts out laughing

Here are the reasons why I believe that romance teasing is inappropriate. I'm not saying these things are inevitable, but--being that romance teasing has absolutely no benefits--it is foolish in light of the abundant danger. 1) Misunderstandings both on the part of the people and outsiders. 2) Humiliation. 3) Feelings being induced the wrong way. 4) Hurt. 5) Disrespect both to parents and to the people. 6) Just plain rudeness of mocking someone's heart. 7) Flirting. 8) Losing sight of the gravity of love. 9) Awkwardness in the friendship of the two people. 10) Friction.

I had wanted to jump in but then didn't...anyways... 1) Misunderdstandings happen anyway. Sometimes the teasing gives the people a chance to talk about what there thinking. 2) Humiliation is part of growing up. You learn a lot from falling down. 3) Hmmm... maybe. 4) Not necessarily. For me, it wasn't that way. 5) Not exactly sure about this one... 6) If the person is extremely sensitive maybe it would be taken that way. 7) Um...disagreed. 8) Maybe... 9) Not necessarily. For me, it wasn't that way. 10) Only if the people being teased take it too personally. 

*snickers* So, did you feel I was flirting with you when I teased you about guys? *sputters and bursts out laughing*

Facedesk, facedesk, facedesk No!!!

Here are the reasons why I believe that romance teasing is inappropriate. I'm not saying these things are inevitable, but--being that romance teasing has absolutely no benefits--it is foolish in light of the abundant danger. 1) Misunderstandings both on the part of the people and outsiders. 2) Humiliation. 3) Feelings being induced the wrong way. 4) Hurt. 5) Disrespect both to parents and to the people. 6) Just plain rudeness of mocking someone's heart. 7) Flirting. 8) Losing sight of the gravity of love. 9) Awkwardness in the friendship of the two people. 10) Friction.

I had wanted to jump in but then didn't...anyways... 1) Misunderdstandings happen anyway. Sometimes the teasing gives the people a chance to talk about what there thinking. 2) Humiliation is part of growing up. You learn a lot from falling down. 3) Hmmm... maybe. 4) Not necessarily. For me, it wasn't that way. 5) Not exactly sure about this one... 6) If the person is extremely sensitive maybe it would be taken that way. 7) Um...disagreed. 8) Maybe... 9) Not necessarily. For me, it wasn't that way. 10) Only if the people being teased take it too personally. 

*snickers* So, did you feel I was flirting with you when I teased you about guys? *sputters and bursts out laughing*

*Facedesk, facedesk, facedesk* No!!!

wipes away tears of mirth

Ah…ha ha…thought so. ;)

Here are the reasons why I believe that romance teasing is inappropriate. I'm not saying these things are inevitable, but--being that romance teasing has absolutely no benefits--it is foolish in light of the abundant danger. 1) Misunderstandings both on the part of the people and outsiders. 2) Humiliation. 3) Feelings being induced the wrong way. 4) Hurt. 5) Disrespect both to parents and to the people. 6) Just plain rudeness of mocking someone's heart. 7) Flirting. 8) Losing sight of the gravity of love. 9) Awkwardness in the friendship of the two people. 10) Friction.

I had wanted to jump in but then didn't...anyways... 1) Misunderdstandings happen anyway. Sometimes the teasing gives the people a chance to talk about what there thinking. 2) Humiliation is part of growing up. You learn a lot from falling down. 3) Hmmm... maybe. 4) Not necessarily. For me, it wasn't that way. 5) Not exactly sure about this one... 6) If the person is extremely sensitive maybe it would be taken that way. 7) Um...disagreed. 8) Maybe... 9) Not necessarily. For me, it wasn't that way. 10) Only if the people being teased take it too personally. 

*snickers* So, did you feel I was flirting with you when I teased you about guys? *sputters and bursts out laughing*

*Facedesk, facedesk, facedesk* No!!!

*wipes away tears of mirth* Ah...ha ha...thought so. ;)

sputters and coughs

Here are the reasons why I believe that romance teasing is inappropriate. I'm not saying these things are inevitable, but--being that romance teasing has absolutely no benefits--it is foolish in light of the abundant danger. 1) Misunderstandings both on the part of the people and outsiders. 2) Humiliation. 3) Feelings being induced the wrong way. 4) Hurt. 5) Disrespect both to parents and to the people. 6) Just plain rudeness of mocking someone's heart. 7) Flirting. 8) Losing sight of the gravity of love. 9) Awkwardness in the friendship of the two people. 10) Friction.

I had wanted to jump in but then didn't...anyways... 1) Misunderdstandings happen anyway. Sometimes the teasing gives the people a chance to talk about what there thinking. 2) Humiliation is part of growing up. You learn a lot from falling down. 3) Hmmm... maybe. 4) Not necessarily. For me, it wasn't that way. 5) Not exactly sure about this one... 6) If the person is extremely sensitive maybe it would be taken that way. 7) Um...disagreed. 8) Maybe... 9) Not necessarily. For me, it wasn't that way. 10) Only if the people being teased take it too personally. 

*snickers* So, did you feel I was flirting with you when I teased you about guys? *sputters and bursts out laughing*

*Facedesk, facedesk, facedesk* No!!!

*wipes away tears of mirth* Ah...ha ha...thought so. ;)

*sputters and coughs*

tosses you a cough drop

*tosses you a cough drop*

Gags Thanks for the cough drop but I can't stand them!