Jokes :)

Started by Dani(elle)
C28bde243ab1957d69d6429cdf8b5e8e?s=128&d=mm

biblebee

10 Fun Facts

  1. You can't wash your eyes with soap

  2. You can't count your hair

  3. You can't breathe through your nose, with your tongue out

  4. You just tried no. 3

  5. When you did no. 3 you realized it's possible, only you look like a dog

  6. You're smiling right now, because you were fooled

  7. You skipped no. 5

  8. You just checked to see if there is a no. 5

  9. I love these things!

61754db001e2e2ef52b2b9212cdda1ec?s=128&d=mm

Matthew Minica

One of my favorite kinds of jokes is humorous definitions. Here's one:

Toe: A part of the body especially useful for finding furniture in the dark.

A3806e5a47ff9fa527155bd268c37099?s=128&d=mm

His Servant

That's a good one, Matthew! :) Do you have any others like that?

What I do in the dark all the time is step on marbles! We used to have a big bag of marbles, but since the little children on Sunday got into it, and now the marbles seem to be everywhere….I'm always stepping on them! (And when I say everywhere, I don't mean they are laying visibly all over…just in corners, and things like that!)

C28bde243ab1957d69d6429cdf8b5e8e?s=128&d=mm

biblebee

Laughs out Loud That is SO true!

Here's another one…Christian shared it on google+ :)

Are oranges named orange because they're orange or is orange called orange because oranges are orange?

C28bde243ab1957d69d6429cdf8b5e8e?s=128&d=mm

biblebee

Yep :)

How about this one:

Said a boy to his teacher one day, "Wright will not write 'right' right." Said the Teacher to Wright, "Wright, write 'right' right right away!"

C28bde243ab1957d69d6429cdf8b5e8e?s=128&d=mm

biblebee

A police officer in Penticton stops at a local ranch.
He talks with an old rancher, and tells him." I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs".
The rancher says, " OKay, but do not go in that field over there," as he is pointing out the location.

The police officer verbally explodes saying,
" Mister, I have the authority of the federal government with me".
Reaching into his rear pants pocket, and proudly displays it to the rancher.
" See the badge? this badge means I am allowed to go on any land … have I made myself clear".

The rancher apologizes, nods and goes about his chores.

A short time later the old rancher hears loud screaming,
looks up and sees the police officer running in front of the farmers Santa Gertrudis bull.
With every step the officer makes the bull gains two, only seconds before the bull reaches him.
The rancher drops his tools and stands up and yells.

                        "Your badge, Show him your badge!"
20c6e1c93d3e838d825200d26333405c?s=128&d=mm

Jackson

Have you ever heard of "a book never written" jokes? Here's some:

"Dangerous Cats" by Ty Gurr.
"Sherlock Holmes" by Mr. E.
"Hammers & Saws" by Bill Ditt.
"Knights at the beach" by Sir Fur.

Efca8a58376d35a79ababc988cf86b5c?s=128&d=mm

Dani(elle)

10 Fun Facts 1. You can't wash your eyes with soap 2. You can't count your hair 3. You can't breathe through your nose, with your tongue out 4. You just tried no. 3 6. When you did no. 3 you realized it's possible, only you look like a dog 7. You're smiling right now, because you were fooled 8. You skipped no. 5 9. You just checked to see if there is a no. 5 10. I love these things!

I TTLY did all that. Lol :)

Trans